Sunny days

Just yesterday, I was struck by the lovely weather and thought to myself “ahh, another sunny day,” having enjoyed some sunshine over the weekend as well. And what better accompaniment to such a day than a song dedicated to sunny days? Like, I don’t know, maybe “Another Sunny Day” by Belle and Sebastian…?

I opened up iTunes, pleased with myself for such inventive thinking. And, it’s not there. Nope. No no no. Not just is ‘Another Sunny Day’ absent from my iTunes but the whole ALBUM HAS DISAPPEARED.

Now, if you know me, you’ll know that I have a soft spot for Belle and Sebastian. My musical taste is, in fact, somewhat limited to Belle & Sebastian, and bands that sound like Belle & Sebastian. I have fleeting little affairs with other bands (right now? Fleet Foxes, Camera Obscura, Elbow) but you can always rely on me to play B&S.

What I am saying is: There is NO WAY that I didn’t have this album on my iTunes. So please can someone explain to me what has happened to it? A Ben Folds track has gone AWOL as well….*

*A little song called ‘The Luckiest’ which I wanted to listen to whilst gazing at my newborn Hallam when he was actually a newborn. What can I say? I am Very Inventive with my musical choices for occasions.

If anyone finds my missing tracks, please tell them I want them back. I’m beginning to think there is something to be said for CDs. Apart from the bloody space they take up and the effort required to lug hundreds of them down stairs when moving out of flats.

I just don’t know

… What I’ve done to the design on this. Maybe I will add ‘web design’ to my list of things that I need to know how to do. Maybe I will add ‘pissing around with my blog’ to my list of things I should not do before 9am.

“I quit my job today”

I can really actually say it now – I DID quit my job today.

Bill looked after Hallam whilst I went in to the new office (again, it’s TEN MINUTES FROM MY FLAT AND LOVELY) and told my boss: “thanks for all the fun times of website production – I would love some more but I can’t really afford to stay in Brighton.” She did not offer me a huge raise! Shocking.

It was a bit crap, I nearly cried, my boss did not. She was nothing but lovely (probably crying on the inside?) and we lamented my short lived career in the worlds of both spa reviews* and baby websites. Then I came home to suck teething snot from Hallam’s nose. Oh baby boy, I have gone from website production to… snot sucking. Yum.

This is the fourth job I have resigned from since starting this blog, not including all those temporary assignments that I didn’t make it back to after my lunch break. This is the first time it’s felt crap though, all the rest of them were with a gun ho “screw you guys!!!” attitude.

So. I guess that’s that then – I am a quitter. Apart from, I haven’t quit my blog – the only thing that has stayed the same for the past few years now (apart from my relationship?) is the fact that I have been whining about it all on the internet. And yet, the internet STILL hasn’t given me any bloody money AT ALL. Boo.

*La de da. Spas. For free. For a job. And I quit it.

Gah!

Boxes, baby, packing, and I am moving in a week…

I’ve been busy, which is rubbish as I would like to whine about a little thing we call teething. But, ho hum, it does seem that the teeth not actually coming through will drag on for, like, ever, so I’m pretty sure my teething woes will still be here next week. That is, next week when I have moved to Devon and have nothing else to do apart from blog about the baby and his lack of teeth.

I know, it’s too exciting.

Am still fucked

I haven’t managed to quit my job yet. Nor will it happen this week, as my boss is out of town. So it turns out I have a miniscule, one week window in which I can actually resign. I keep saying to people “ha. I am moving next week but have not told work yet! Ha ha ho ha ha!” but actually, really, it’s not very funny. I don’t want to quit this job and that makes a big difference to my ability to saunter on in and quit it. But, I also don’t want to go back to work full time. I want to spend this time with Hallam. I can’t afford to go back part time. So, quit it I must. But, whine whine whinge whine and sulk – I LIKE THIS JOB. But I like Hallam more. The end.

But, I will find another job I like one day, won’t I? I definitely absolutely need to write some award winning fiction.

Bummer

I quit my job today!!!!

Is what I would be saying, if I wasn’t quite so much of a wimp.

Hallam and I went into the (new, 10 minute walk from my flat, for fuck’s sake) office to introduce him to everyone. I thought I’d have a moment with my boss and explain that, well, I don’t earn anywhere near enough money to be able to afford to live here with a baby. And then she’d say “oohh don’t be silly, here’s a big pay rise” and we’d buy a house in Brighton and life would be wonderful. Or she’d say “I know, it’s just so expensive round here. Why don’t you move to Devon and work remotely?”

But actually, I know that she will say neither of those things and I am not quite ready to give up my tiny bit of hope yet. So… One job = not quit. And we are MOVING in, like, 5 minutes or something.

So basically, I will have moved 5 hours away from my work and still won’t have quit.

Am fucked.

Hi!

Big Scream!

Ok so last time I was all moany about ‘I can’t go to a gig’ but THIS TIME, I must celebrate for we have been to the baby cinema to see Australia.

OMG! The cinema! How I have missed thee. Hallam was a well-behaved star and I had popcorn. We are both a bit tired out from all the excitement – Hallam has been asleep for the past two and a half hours. But, baby cinema is lots of fun. I never thought I could enjoy a film with babies crying around me and crawling little people coming over to clutch at my knees. But, no, it’s still wonderful.

We went to see Australia which looked rather stunning and Nicole Kidman was, for the first time ever, not annoying. It could be because I was somewhat distracted by jigging and breastfeeding. But I guess it doesn’t really matter WHAT we saw – for the first time in months and months I have been to the cinema! HURRAH!

The sappity sap of sappyness

This has been the weekend of the things (Rob Brydon, Elbow) I thought I would be able to go to when the baby was four months old. But, nope, no babysitter meant that Bill went to Rob Brydon AND Elbow and I stayed at home with Hallam whilst he slept the entire time anyway. Ty-pi-cal! I mean, really.. Could have just gone out and left the baby at home on his own and then come back and he wouldn’t have known any different?! (Just typing that sentence has made me go all queasy and feel like I need to go and wake Hallam up just to tell him that I am joking, I will never leave him all evening on his own. No, not even when he is 30.)

Oh well. There will be other gigs and comedy things to go to in the future (like Yann Tiersen!!!! IN EXETER!??! After the gig, Yann is going to whisk me off to Paris where I will live a life of Amelie whilst he follows me about playing the accordian.) However, I must be a wee bit sulky and say: it would have been fairly wonderful to see ‘One Day Like This’ live. Ahh. I wonder if I will ever tire of hearing that song? Or if it will ever fail to make me smile/cry?

BUT THEN I think of Hallam and I wonder if I’d be capable of feeling quite so intensely emotional if it wasn’t for him in the first place. I love that song most of all because I played it over and over again when I was pregnant, and it reminds me of how fabulous that whole being pregnant thing was and how brilliant the whole becoming a mum has been sofar. And then I remind myself that – well – it doesn’t matter if I miss a few things, or a lot of things, because we have a whole new person in our lives who is worth missing anything for. (Oh my god. Ok. BYE readers of this blog, for I have crossed the line from mildly entertaining if a little preoccupied by the baby to..well, total sap.)

Ppfft

We have had “OMG I am ill and have a baby to tend for” and we have had “OMFG my baby has a cold and I am helpless” but NOW…. NOW we have “OMFG, FFS both my baby and myself have colds, what hope do we have of making it through this alive?”

Seriously. As I clumsily make my way through this parenting malarkey, I never cease to be amazed by what parents do for their precious babies. I mean, we SUCK SNOT FROM THEIR NOSES.

OK?

So this week I have been sucking snot out of Hallam’s nose, not taking any medication, expressing and drinking fennel tea all day to boost my BLOODY SUPPLY which may or may not be pants thanks to a rubbish weight gain this time, and.. I’m still chipper, because he has learnt to roll over. Which is one step closer to learning to walk to the shop for me to bring me medicine.